
Why Christian Dating is Not Brutal
This post is a rebuttal to the article by Danica Hughes at Church of the Rock. In a nutshell Danica portrays Christian dating as fraught with the same issues as secular dating, from a plethora of mediocre first coffee dates to dealing with sexual purity issues resulting in snap decision marriages. In fairness, she does eventually land on the idea to have a date with God and to prepare and consult with Him on dating, marriage and relationships.
Although I strongly agree with Danica’s conclusions at the end of her article, I strongly disagree with Christian Dating being brutal. Scripture warns us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers in 2 Corinthians 6:14, this means we should not associate with believers who don’t actually live for Jesus and so engaging in any sort of intimate relationship or partnership with someone who does not let Jesus be the center of their lives could ultimately lead to shipwreck.
That being said, the goal of Christian dating is less about satisfying your notions of what you would like to see in a partner or spouse, and more about having FAITH in Jesus that of the approximately seven billion souls on planet earth, God has in mind who He has willed for you as a marriage partner. So we keep our eyes fixed on Christ and constantly pray to the King of Glory to reveal to us His chosen partner.
Practically however, because we live in a broken world, it’s not that easy to discern the person whom God has for us. If we believe that God is a good God, then we should also have faith that the Lord will provide a spouse that is perfectly suited for us in every way.
Discernment comes by way of a lot of prayer, chemistry (because let’s be honest we’re not robots) and a strong mutual desire to live for Christ.
Although there are no magic formulas, it is important to be able to spot a fake from a genuine living for Christ believer.
Top 5 ways to filter out fake or lukewarm Christians
- He or She never mentions Jesus in conversation
- He or She is not interested in reading their Bible
- He or She has no passion for prayer
- He or She holds views that are opposed to the God of the Bible
- He or She speaks more about themselves than they do about Christ