Accept Her “Negative Emotions”
The Generous Husband
Yes, women are “more emotional” than men. Some studies suggest men feel things just as strongly or even more strongly than women, but are better at keeping their emotions suppressed. But that’s another post. Regardless of the reason, odds are your wife is more expressive of her emotions and that includes “negative” or painful emotions.
It’s common for men to get frustrated or even angry when their wife cries. I suspect this is our reaction to not knowing what to do about her pain. But regardless of why we react badly, it just makes our wife feel worse and hurts our relationship with her.
So here’s the secret: she doesn’t expect you to make it better. She’s not looking to you to fix it or make it go away. But she really would like you to hold and comfort her. Say you’re sorry for the situation and the pain. Tell her that you love her. Tell her you’re there for her and will help if she thinks you can do something that will make it better. Listen to her explain what she’s feeling and don’t get freaked out by tears.
Doing these things will actually make her feel better, and they will make her feel loved by you. And that’s a very good thing for both of you and for your marriage.
A post worth reading:
Shaunti Feldhahn | 3 Great Ways to Handle Drama ◄ Written for dealing with kids, but works for a wife too.
Image Credit: © fizkes | stock.adobe.com
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